Give a hoot, don't pollute

I went to return my library books the other day, and I spotted this bumper sticker (which I absolutely love) and it was a strange coincidence, because my co-worker and I had just been discussing littering. My office is at Innovation Park, which is basically a big circle. Lots of people, including me, go out and walk around the loop when we need a break from work. And there is always some kind of trash out there along the street. I notice this same phenomenon lots of places; I guess that’s why they have that adopt-a-highway program. And why you always see the prisoners in the stripe-y outfits and juvenile delinquents doing community service with a hefty bag and a trash-picking stick by the side of the road. But I have to wonder, who exactly are these people that just chuck their trash out of the car all willy-nilly?

It would never even occur to me to pitch my trash on the side of the road. I mean, maybe something biodegradable like an apple core or some peanut shells, but actual trash? Who does that? I’ve been known to pour out the dregs of a beverage by the side of the road, but I would never throw out the cup as well. I just don’t get this. Like if you are on a road trip and you have a bag of fast-food wrappers from a stop at the Taco Bell or whatever…can’t you just toss them into the back seat until you stop for gas? Do you really need them out of the car so badly that they have to leave the vehicle right that second? Garbage cans are ubiquitous. You can find tons of them at the gas station, the rest stop, the fast food restaurant, your home, your hotel, the tourist destination of your choice…just hold onto your trash until you get there, people.

And, while we are on the subject, don’t they still teach kids in school not to litter? I remember all kinds of anti-littering lessons delivered by Woodsy Owl. We even had to learn a song about him (which, surprisingly, I can find nowhere on the interwebs [to digress, I had this same problem when I tried to find a recording of the original version of Hey, Hey, Tampa Bay…the “The Bucs know how to shine” one from the ‘70’s, not the new one] sometimes the interwebs let you down. Especially on stuff like this from my childhood, when nobody had video cameras or VCRs.) I do remember that the song had the following lyrics “

"Give a hoot, don’t pollute.
Never be a dirty bird.
In the city or in the wood,
help keep America looking good”

If you ask me, that’s still a good lesson for today.

Why do people do this?

So you know what I don’t get? People who back into parking spaces. What is that about? Empirically, it is more difficult to drive a car backward than forward. It just is. You have to crane your neck around to look over your shoulder or use the rear view mirror and remember things are backward and you can’t see what’s happening down by your tires...it’s just a pain in the ass. Yet people do it all the time. Witness the photo taken this afternoon in my office parking lot:


At least here there is ample parking so you can back into spaces that don't have other cars right next to them, but people still do it even when all the spaces are occupied. It makes no sense. When you pull into a space, you are moving into a more constricted space surrounded by obstacles (i.e. the other cars) that you have to avoid. Why would you want to do that backwards? And backing into a parking space is different than backing out of one. When you back out, you are moving from the more constricted spot to a more open one…much easier to do backward.

I have less of an objection if the parking situation is like this:



...and you pull through from one side to the other. I do that myself on occasion (but note: only when the parking lot is really empty. There is nothing more annoying that getting ready to pull into a parking place the normal way and getting almost hit head-on by someone pulling through from the other side.)

People make the argument that they park this way because it is easier and quicker to get out of the space when it is time to leave. That is nonsense. The few seconds you save when exiting won't make up for the extra time, bother, and skill required to back in on arrival. And, unless you are robbing the joint, how fast do you really need to make a getaway?

An open letter to traffic:

Dear Tallahasse commuters,

Why do you drive like that?  Speeding and constantly switching lanes in an effort to get ahead, only to end up stopped at the same red light as me 30 seconds later.  It makes you seem like kind of an asshole. 

In fact, I bet you are an asshole.

Be polite and learn to drive better, asshole.

Ambassador? Really?

So I had to reserve a room at a hotel today for a work conference. I went online and and found a room and I proceeded to fill out the required info on the reservation form. They of course, asked for first name and last name, but there was also a box in front of those two for title. This is where I would usually have selected Ms. I'm a big believer in the usage of Ms. Men don't announce their marital status in their title, why should the ladies have to? I even looked Ms. up in Garner's, just out of curiosity, and it was listed under the section on sexism. He agrees with me. See:

Anyway, I would have chosen Ms., but weirdly that option was not available on the provided drop-down menu. Doesn't that seem odd in this day and age. I mean, everyone offers Ms. as an option, don't they?

I would chalk it up to the form trying to save space or limit options or whatever, but the thing is that the drop-down list included like every other possible title in the world.

Here is the list from which I could choose : Mr., Mrs., Miss, M/M, Dr., Prof., Judge, Amb., Sen., Rep., Col., Maj., Gen., Rev. or None.

I mean, come on...Ambassador, Senator, and Representative made the list? And it's so arbitrary. Colonial, Major, and General, but no love for the Sgt. or Lt.? And Reverend, but not Father or Rabbi or Imam? What about that M/M option, which I assume stands for "Mr. and/or Mrs."? That makes absolutely no sense, since there is only space for one person's name on the form. So weird. Anyway, I was forced to select none. Stupid conference hotel.

decline and fall of civilized society (chapter 3)

Sigh...

Click pics to enlarge

It's the grocery store line all over again

.

decline and fall of civilized society (chapter 2)

So we had a hellacious storm yesterday and the power was knocked out here and there. When this happens, I am sometimes forced to once again face my old nemesis, the 4-way stop. Actually, that's not right. The 4-way stop is not my nemesis. I love the 4-way stop. It's so civilized, everyone takes turns, it's lovely. I think it should be all 4-way stops and roundabouts all the time. No, my actual nemesis is all those damn people who don't know what do when a traffic light is out. Morons.

When a traffic light is not functioning, it is supposed to be treated as if it were a 4-way stop. Everyone approaches the intersection, stops, and then proceeds according to turn. Usually, this seems to go ok when the intersection looks like this:


But not so much when the intersection looks like this:


I encountered this little scenario recently. The light was out at an intersection just like this one, where lanes 1- 13 comprise a major thoroughfare through town, while lanes 14-17 are side roads that lead to popular shopping centers and off-the-main-road-shortcuts. Obviously, there is quite a bit of traffic in both directions. Actually, it's really a bigger intersection that the picture shows. I just got bored with drawing it. I think there are actually 5 lanes on the bottom right, so that would be 11, 12, 13, 13a, and 13b.

But, I digress. My point is...it's still a 4-way stop people. Just because normally more than one car gets to go through the intersection in the 1-13 direction doesn't mean that is still the case when the light is out. You still treat it like a 4-way stop. Approach the intersection. Stop. Let the cars from the other direction go. Then you go. Not rocket science people...

The decline and fall of civilized society

Sometimes I’m not too sure about people. I mean in general they seem ok, but I also sense a distinct and prevailing...impoliteness I guess you would call it, permeating the species. Basically, I don’t understand why people act the way they do. And I'm not talking about the big issues like, "why is there war and bigotry when we should all just be able to get along?" or "why do boys act that way?" I'm talking about little day to day choices that people make without considering how it might affect another person.

Case in point: the grocery store. So there's one register open and a number of people standing in line. Noticing this, the store opens another register. What should happen in this situation is that the person who is next in the original line should move over to become the first person in the newly opened line. Person number 3 can then decide whether to remain in the old line or switch to the new—based on which they think will move faster. Then the rest of the people can divide themselves accordingly. But what actually happens is this: the new line opens, the people in the back of the line see their chance to get ahead a make a break for it, and they end up ahead of the people who had been waiting patiently to pay for their purchases long before those back of the line people even got there.

Again, it’s a small thing, but it’s also an illustration of how people seem to look out only for themselves. As long as they don’t have to wait in a long line, it doesn’t matter how it impacts others. It's like the people who don't recycle because it's too much trouble for them to rinse out their yogurt container or break down their cardboard boxes or whatever. "It's just one soda can, how much damage can it do? Besides, other people are recycling, so that should take care of it, right?"

I know I sound like a grumpy 98 year old talking about how “these kids today got no respect” but to that 98 year old I say "word" Common courtesy people...get with the program.